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Thursday, January 25, 2007

Fake Will - Just so you see what you are really doing if you don't have a Will

LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT OF "WILL" LESS

I, "WILL" LESS, do hereby forfeit my right to make, publish, and declare a Last Will and Testament.

I. GIFTS, BEQUESTS, AND DEVISES OF PROPERTY.
A. If my spouse survives me and my parents are deceased, then my spouse shall receive my entire estate, and nothing shall go to my descendents (children or grandchildren) unless they are not my spouse’s children also. My spouse shall receive the entire amount even if we are in the process of getting a divorce and the divorce is not yet final.
B. If, however, I have descendents that are not descendents of my spouse and my spouse survives me, then I leave to my spouse 25% of my estate, but not less than $50,000.00 nor more than $200,000.00, plus one-half of any balance of my estate, the other one-half shall go equally to such surviving descendents who are not related to my spouse.
C. If, however, I do not have any descendents and my spouse survives me and at least one of my parents also survives me, then I leave to my spouse 25% of my estate, but not less than $50,000.00 nor more than $200,000.00, plus three-fourths of any balance of my estate, the other one-fourth shall go to my parents, not to my spouse.

II. COURT ACCOUNTINGS.
A. My spouse will be appointed the guardian of my children, but shall be required to report to the Probate Court, at such intervals as the court requires, to render an accounting of how, why, and where she spent the children's money if the annual income for each child is greater than $5,000.
B. When a child of mine shall reach the age of 18 years, such child shall have the right to demand of my spouse, his/her mother or father, a complete accounting of all financial transactions pertaining to his/her money.

III. PERFORMANCE BOND.
A. Whatever poor soul decides to figure out my estate and pay my bills shall be required to purchase, at the expense of my estate, and produce to the Probate Court a Performance Bond to guarantee that she will exercise proper judgment in handling, investing, and spending the children's money. This Bond shall remain in force until the youngest of my children reaches the age of 18 years.

IV. DISTRIBUTION TO ISSUE.
A. When one of my issue shall reach the age of 18 years, he shall have an unfettered right to withdraw and to spend his share of my estate. No person or court may question the beneficiary's readiness to manage large sums of cash and other property.

V. GUARDIANSHIP.
A. I forfeit my right to nominate the guardian of my children in case my spouse should predecease me or die while any of my children are minors.
B. Instead of my having nominated a guardian of my choice, my friends and relatives shall be permitted to select a guardian by mutual agreement, if same be possible.
C. In the event that they fail to agree, the Probate Court shall select the guardian of my children. The person selected may be a total stranger to me, or worse, someone I would not have chosen.

VI. DEATH TAXES.
A. I give, devise, and bequeath to Uncle Sam and to the Governor of New Jersey the maximum amount of federal and state death taxes payable as the result of my death.

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have set my hand and seal to this, my Last Will and Testament, on this _____ day of ____________________, 20__.

______________________
“WILL” LESS

1 comment:

Alena Herranen said...

This is great! Thanks for posting this entertaining and informative "fake will".